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Sunday, June 12, 2011

StS Day 7

Well I did my weigh in today. I was beyond depressed. Minus the brownie incident, I thought I had been doing pretty good with my eating and even though I had been less than diligent with my workouts. I figured I'd still be the same or maybe a few ounces under but no. I'm up 3 pounds. Like I said, beyond depressed. I started feeling really down on myself and I all sorts of ready to just give up. I have hit my highest weight of 223 and in my mind I felt like I had done all this hard work so I couldn't understand how I had ended up here. Then I realized that it's my own fault and I have no one and nothing else to blame for where I'm at right now.

I've been putting in less then 100% on my part and quite honestly I'm sick of it. I know I've said I need to step it up and really put my heart into it but I don't think I ever really believed it until today. I thought I could just do the bare minimum and somehow manage to make it work. I CAN'T DO THAT!!!!!!!!! I need to buckle down and really put in a huge effort. I need to get myself on a sleep schedule and get up and work out. I need to make my menus and stick to them instead of  just being lazy about it. I need to focus on my portion control and really try hard to stick to it. I also need to believe in myself and know that I can make this happen. I don't know how many of you read my post about losing weight to start a family but that's been on my mind a lot today.

My sister S has been in an adoption process for about 12 weeks. The baby mama gave birth this morning making my beautiful sister a first time mommy. I am so happy for her and so excited to meet my little niece Iz, but it reminded me of my goal of wanting to be a mommy myself and how I'm not working towards that goal at all. Hubby is wanted to get pregnant when we get home from our anniversary trip. So first off, I need to lose the weight for our trip but I also have to lose it to be able to have a healthy pregnancy. I'm sure once I lose the weight though I'm going to want to wait to get pregnant so I can keep the weight off for a while. Either way I need to lose weight to obtain my ultimate goal of starting a family.

So I'm having a change of heart here and now. I'm not going to slack off any more. I'm going to make sacrifices and I'm going to put in the effort. I'm going to make changes for the better and I'm going to prevail!!!!!!!

6 comments:

  1. The most important thing is to pick yourself up, brush yourself off and get back in the game. You have some great motivation to get you to your goal weight. Stay strong and the most important thing is to Plan ahead. Good luck this week and I look forward to following your progress.

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  2. How do you track what you are eating? I use My Fitness Pal and it's awesome! They even have a smart phone app that makes everything more convenient (if you have a smart phone). This week is a new week, it sounds like you know what you need to do, so stick to it. You can do it!

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  3. My fitness pal has a great database and most foods can be found. just gotta check if they have all the dietary stuff added like fat and carbs and sodium. Very few I have run into do not.
    Thing is about food, it is easy to put behind you what you ate, cuz pardon me but it literally leaves your behind and gets flushed. On to another day/week. It already almost down the drain, right. So we look forward to having you with us. Be strong. Oh after i did so well, this week I ate a no no and rationalized it as I have a week to pay for it. It was a little off my plan, but off my plan for sure.

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  4. I would suggest the age old "JUST SAY NO". Make some serious rules for yourself, and DO NOT BREAK THEM. No matter how tired/sick/angry/sad you are, no matter how good the brownies/pizza/soda/whatever look, JUST SAY NO.
    Another little tip/idea. DON'T watch TV or movies (anything that is using zero energy) UNLESS you are working out at the same time. That is one way I got into going to the gym. I used to HATE cardio (ok, I still do...) but I would go to the gym when my favorite show was on, and do the treadmill while I watched it. Don't ever sit down to watch TV. Get on a bike or treadmill, or have some weights handy and do lifts/stretches/ANYTHING but sit on the couch. :) Just an idea, but I think it's a great one. The TV distracts your mind from the pain or boredom of working out, and it goes by quicker as you get into whatever you're watching. Just DON'T SIT DOWN!! :)

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  5. Yeah, you can do this. It is hard and a struggle at times, but you can do it. Log your food and keep strong. You are so young. Wouldn't it be great if you lick your weight now, rather than when you are older like me?? michele

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  6. Yup, you said it, time to step it up! It's not going to help to be depressed about what you did, focus on what you will DO. I so hope that this week turned out better. This takes effort to MAKE this happen!

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